9 Things You Didn’t Know About Tom Jones
When it comes to geriatric singers or crooners, most minds go to the classy ones; Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennett, Leonard Cohen. There’s an image of tuxedos, fedoras and martinis. It’s part of the package required to become respectable in your old age to a new audience that may not remember that at one time you were a bit of a douche, like say, Rod Stewart.
Then there is Tom Jones. He is in a class by himself, for the sole reason of being Tom Jones. He’s the type of guy that would show up unannounced at a funeral, shirt unbuttoned, belt buckle shining and go comfort the grieving widow in a coat closet, no matter what age.
Tom Jones is the epitome of the American Dream, much like Shania Twain, Celine Dion and Psi. He was the son of a coal miner, became a husband and a father at age 16 (okay,maybe that’s not part of the American Dream). Yet at the start of adulthood he was working on construction sites and by his mid-twenties he had sung his way into the international stratosphere with his first break out single, ‘It’s Not Unusual’. He became friends with Elvis Presley, women began fainting at his shows and he hosted his own musical variety show.
In his later years he was knighted by the Queen and has taken on coaching others in UK’s The Voice. So all of this may come as a surprise to many Americans that he did it all in the United Kingdom and was born in South Wales.
Here are some things you may or may not know about the original Tom Jones.
9. He is a High School Drop Out and Still Married to His First Love
As mentioned, when most guys were just hoping to get through high school and get laid he accomplished all that before the age of 16, at which time he realized school had no more to offer him so he dropped out and started to raise a family, mainly because there was no sex education offered at that time and he’s Tom Jones. He then married the woman that bore him his son and they are still married but one can only imagine that she must be one of the most understanding women on the planet. After all, she’s married to Tom Jones.
8. He Can Dance if He Wants To
If you or me tried to imitate Tom Jones’ moves on the dance floor, we would get abandoned, heckled, and have drinks thrown at us before getting thrown out of the club and not necessarily in that order. Check out this clip from 1967. If you can’t wait for the dancing payoff, then jump right to 1m15 and prepare to be ‘Joned’ away. To you and me, it may look like he’s dancing like a spastic monkey on espresso but for some reason, this worked. One can only assume that the sixties were a different, simpler time where being Tom Jones meant you didn’t need a choreographer you just needed to show up and get the cameras rolling.
7. If James Bond Was A Singer, He’d Be Tom Jones
The Thunderball theme song isn’t about James Bond, it’s about Tom Jones. It’s probably why he sang it, realizing the eerie similarities between himself and Bond with the major exception is that it has taken 6 actors to portray James Bond while it only takes one Tom Jones. It is said he sang this song so hard (because he is Tom Jones) he nearly passed out in ecstasy after singing the final note.
6. He Is The Original Sex Bomb
Not to say that Tom Jones has a way with the ladies, but again here he is in 1970 and twenty years later performing Sex Bomb. Sex Bomb one can only presume is about Tom Jones and what happened every time he got up on stage at Las Vegas, London or just ordered something at the local Starbucks. Women exploded in his presence, many leaving nothing behind but their undergarments and hotel room keys. Tom Jones went beyond mere sexual magnetism and into orgasmic explosiveness.
Plus, he belted Sex Bomb out at the lean age of 59 on his album Reload, which in itself gave him 5 top 40 hits in the UK. So when most people are planning the countdown to retirement, TJ was still competing against singers 40 years younger than him and kicking it. The Sex Bomb video(s) reiterated that he was still a ladies man, making him a triple generational threat to your girlfriend, Mom and Grandma.
5. He’s Okay with Lowering the Bar and You Should Be To
In 1988 Tom Jones recorded ‘Kiss’ with Art of Noise, which made it okay for men to rethink the idea that only hot women should be deserving of their attention when it comes to sex (not that was ever really an issue). Tom Jones said through song that he really doesn’t give a crap what you look like, he’ll do you.
Literally. This is the first verse of ‘Kiss’;
You don’t have to be beautiful
To turn me on
I just need your body, baby
From dusk till dawn
You don’t need experience
To turn me out
You just leave it all up to me
I’ll show you what it’s all about
To turn me on
I just need your body, baby
From dusk till dawn
You don’t need experience
To turn me out
You just leave it all up to me
I’ll show you what it’s all about
Of course, it may sound extremely misogynistic on the outside but again; Tom Jones. See previous example. And truthfully, this song was written by Prince, the Artist formerly known as Who Cares Just Sing Purple Rain, who has been compared as a mini-Tom Jones Sex Bomb yet ironically never seemed to drop the bar on who he shagged.
4. He Literally Is Musical Royalty
In 2006 he was knighted by Queen Elizabeth officially for his service to music and unofficially for his dedication in keeping the birth rate in England climbing for over 40 years. He joined the likes of Sir Mick Jagger, Sir Cliff Richard, Sir Elton John, Sir Paul McCartney, Semi-Sirs (if they weren’t Irish) Bob Geldoff and Bono. I heard the annual picnics are amazing but nobody is allowed near a stereo.
3. Tom Jones Continues To Have An Amazing Set Of Pipes
This is a sample of Tom in 2009, belting out a war cry at age 69, an age when our dads are constantly complaining about what the weather is doing to their tomatoes or the crickets in the garden are too loud. The start of this song isn’t just a note, this is a warning signal to all ladies of all ages to hold onto their panties in case they rip off in a sheer case of Tom Jones sexbombiness (#4).
To prove age has no meaning for him, he belted out another scream at 3m07 in case you can’t handle 3 full minutes of Tom Jones.
2. He Will Take Your Song and Make It Better
He’s sang with pretty much every legend in the music industry. Janis Joplin, Elvis, Aretha Franklin, even John Denver. He’s covered songs by the aforementioned Prince, Leonard Cohen, Lenny Kravitz, Beatles, Ram Jam, Eric Clapton, Otis Redding, Van Morrison and even shared a stage once with Engelbert Humperdinck, at which time it is said nearly the entire female population of the audience became immaculately impregnated through the sheer testosterone coming from the two of them.
1. He’s So Good, He Doesn’t Need 10 Reasons
’nuff said.
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