The Other Off-Season Game Plan - The Toronto Maple Leafs Edition

Here I am only 5 teams into this and I'm feeling the heat. And by heat I mean futility. This is hard work, dissecting these losing teams and coming up with some advice that will never be used by the team in question. I sometimes wonder how Scott Cullen at TSN is able to do this, especially when he tries to factor in statistics like 'points allowed when Patrick Kane is on the Ice' aka PAPKI. Then I remember he's getting paid to write and has many hours to sit at his desk and surf all the relevant websites to find evidence to back up his decisions. I also realize that the further up the points chain I go, the dissection will be easier. Chicago should be nothing more than a simple three word entry; 'All Good here'.  But then I have to find the pictures which is really half the fun but also where the real work happens.

On the other hand I have a job that allows me to write when all is quiet because technically I'm not allowed to sleep on shift.

So speaking of going to sleep, let's talk about TSN's favourite team to hate; The Toronto Maple Leafs!




Head Coach

The Leafs played well enough for the first 30 games with the occasional losing streak balanced by the occasional winning streak. That's hockey. But not good enough for the Toronto media who picked over every goal and loss to the point everyone could feel how much every Maple Leaf player hated talking to the media, especially their 'Name' players, Phil Kessel and Dion Phaneuf.

Then they fired Randy Caryle. And by they, I mean the Toronto Media through Dave Nonis aka Baby Burke. I don't know why he started paying attention to the press but that was his second biggest mistake.

His first? Remember when the team didn't salute the fans for a couple games, games in which they won? And how much of a shitstorm that caused (in the media)? Then after the backlash, the team returned to saluting the fans? Remember how it all went downhill after that? You can bet that team was ordered by Nonis (probably through Hordichuk) to return to saluting the fans.

That was the tipping point for the demise of the Maple Leaf season. They lost all respect for their leadership and it showed on the ice.

Of course, besides showing the team that he cared more about public relations than winning, Nonis also never 'upgraded' Darcy Hordichuk to head coach or made any serious effort to hire another head coach. He instead lets Hordichuk suffer the most inglorious sinking of a career since Jon Tortorella in Vancouver. It was truly painful. It appeared Nonis was also suffering from the McConnor Lottery syndrome but unfortunately Coach Caryle built up a good enough team at the start of the year that even they couldn't tank bad enough to beat out Edmonton, Arizona and Buffalo.

But Nonis isn't all to blame. New hockey boss Brendan Shanahan allowed this all to happen, as is his want. Then before Nonis can look like a genius if the Leafs won the lottery, Shanahan fired him and finally put Hordichuk out of his misery. The Maple Leaf team is once again rudderless heading into the off-season.

So now what?

Find a head coach that is knows hockey is as much about public relations as it is about winning games. Someone so upbeat and positive that no matter how much shit Toronto media throws at him, he still walks away with a smile on his face. Better yet, adopt a 'No Stupid Questions' policy to the Media. Anyone starting a question with "How does it feel..." is suspended from the dressing room indefinitely. Invoke incentives for the players to become mass illiterate.

That fedora just screams Toronto.

And that man is Alain Vigneault. But he isn't available so my 2nd choice is Dan Bylsma, former Pittsburgh Penguin coach. He knows talent, he knows dressing room egos and he knows confidence. Of course if Shanahan wants to go full retard, he can bring back Mike Keenan and unleash him on the Toronto press but they would just love the shit out of that. The Leafs need less press, not more.

Forwards

If it was anywhere but Toronto, you'd look at that bunch of forwards and say 'hey, this isn't a bad team'. They still have Phil Kessel, who once fought Jon Scott, in case anyone forgot. It was awesome.

They also have James Van Reimsdyk who has a very cool name. Nazim Kadri, who everyone ignores is the highest profile (and therefore probably scoring) East Indian hockey player ever. That's a pretty decent first line. Joffrey Lupul, Peter Holland (not to be confused with one and done Dave Bolland) and Tyler Bozak make up a decent second line. David Clarkson's paycheck was traded for Nathan Horton's which everyone thought was an amazing deal from a GM's perspective. I'd be keeping the bunch. There's no reason to implode this team. There's no lack of talent here.

Defence

Same with the defence. Sure, people like to pick on Dion Phaneuf becomes his last name is funny, he's married to someone famous and he's the Captain. The problem is Toronto Media want Wendel Clark, Doug Gilmour, Mats Sundin type captaincy. A defenceman will never be the type of Captain Toronto wants. He's like Captain Jane Hathaway on Star Trek; Voyager. Serviceable, but no Captain Kirk or Picard. They have a good core group of defence and other than some minor changes there's no need to invest heavily in overhauling the back end.

Goalies

It was an odd couple of years for the Leaf duo of Reimer and Bernier. Reimer looked to have won the starting job with a decent run in the playoffs. Then in the off-season they acquired Jonathon Bernier and announced they had no intention of using him as a back-up goalie. So they went to a 1a and 1b type system which didn't do anyone any good. Bernier received the benefit of more starts as time went on but nobody really took the starting job by the horns. However, truthfully that would mean a Leaf goalie having like three shutouts in a row before it would merit serious consideration in the Toronto media.

The highlight of Bernier's Leaf career.

As is, it's their weakest position. Decide on one of them to be your starter. If they re-sign Bernier, trade Reimer. Otherwise, he's your #1 goalie. Don't allow him to talk to the media or have access to any television or internet source.

Summary

The Leafs are suffering from severe dressing room morale, abetted by severe media scrutiny. They are the NHL's most prosperous team and as long as the seats keep being filled there is no need for ownership to spend dollars on a winning team. Torontonians established that they will buy tickets no matter how bad the team is and the funny thing is, they actually are a good team. Let them build some team morale, give Dion and Phil a break and establish your #1 goalie early. The rest will come together.


My #1 Priority - banning negative Toronto media and TSN Sportsdesk from the dressing room
My #2 Priority - a media savvy Head Coach, preferably Dan Blysma
My #3 Priority - establish a starting goaltender in training camp.

And Remember He is Always Watching 

***UPDATE*** Leafs have hired Mike Babcock for a cringe-worthy/unprecedented 8 year contract worth 50 MILLION.

***UPDATE 2 *** Leaf Nation confused as to if Babcock has been signed to play or coach and if his salary counts against the Salary Cap (it doesn't).

***UPDATE 3*** Ogie's viewpoint. While this does meet both my #1 and #2 priority, I don't get it. Leave it to the Leafs. They've hired a head coach who will be more powerful than whomever they pick as General Manager which is a reversal in the power structure of most organizations. He's better paid than everyone on the team barring Phaneuf and Kessel. They've hired a coach that hasn't been past the second round of the playoffs since 2009 which was glazed over when the Babs watch was on. Everyone seems to have forgotten that Babcock inherited a great Detroit team from Scotty Bowman at it's peak. Yzerman, Shanahan, Lidstrom, Vernon, Datsuyk, Zetterberg... it's hard to create a losing team with that talent. Yes, he's won Olympic gold but again - look at the team he was 'coaching'. He's an average coach who has coached above average teams to average success. He should be able to make Toronto average, which is what they were last year under Caryle.
I don't see much happening for the Leafs; yes, they can make the playoffs next year, just like last year. But for all 8 years Babs has signed on for? I doubt it.